A letter to my Nephews.

I read a blog not so long ago in which a man wrote a letter to his hypothetically gay son. It really got to me that a man would put in writing what he planned to do to support his son. It said to me that regardless of what the future holds, this man intends to do what he can to help his boy. And he means to be held accountable to that intention by the son himself.
Now, I don't have any children. 
What I have, as anybody who has read this blog can attest, is nephews. I have four of them. Soon to have five. I take my job as their aunt very seriously.
Seriously enough to make them some promises and put those promises on line. So that if I fall down on the job they can pull these things up and hold me accountable to the aunt job. This is by no means a statement of my faith in the boy’s parents; they have fantastic parents. This is what I mean to do as Aunt Jen.

Hello my loves.
This is your promise list. If you ever find I'm not keeping my promises to you, I expect one of you to print this out and bring it to me to remind me.

I promise to love you all the days of my life. Gay, straight, religious, atheist, right wing, left wing, anarchist or conformist. You are my boys and that will not change.

I promise to respect you. You are people even when you are small.

I promise to get to know who you are, not expect you to be who I want.

I promise to be your safe place. If sometimes you need a break from your parents never for a moment think you have no place to go. I am that place.

I promise to help with your education. Education is important but being saddled with huge debts when you’re done is stressful. I'll do what I can.

I promise to kick your butts as hard, if not harder than your parents. Never for a moment think that just because your mom and dad didn't see you do something it's cool. The world is a rough place for people who don't learn right from wrong. I would be remiss in my job if I let you think you can get away with being a jerk.

I promise to let you be boys. Being a boy is not always encouraged in today's world. It's perfectly fine with me if you are boys. Go ahead, get dirty, run around like heathens, do what you need to do to be boys.

I promise to bring the fun as often as possible. I expect you to behave, not be boring.

I promise to tell you the truth. About sex, drugs, rock n roll, life, history, anything you ask me about. I may tell you something is none of your business, but I will never lie to you.

I promise to sneak you candy. It's your mom and dad's jobs to keep your sugar intake low. It's mine to see you get some candy. Good candy though, life is too short for cheap candy.

I promise to embarrass the hell out of you at your sporting events. I will wear colours and bring air horns. Sorry dudes, aunt's prerogative. 

I promise to grow fangs and claws if anybody messes with you. I will bring seven kinds of crazy.

I promise to tell you straight out if the girls you date are hussies. Your parents may need to be politically correct. I don't have to be.

I promise to pick you up if you call me. Two o'clock in the morning or two in the afternoon. If you're at the police station, though call your parents 'cause I'll kill ya. You call me BEFORE the cops get involved.

Love Aunt Jen. (or mean Aunt Jen as some of you may call me)